I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
