Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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