I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Randomize
