Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
NoShamevember. You game?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
