we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
