I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize
