Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
