i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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