East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
