how can u be prego again
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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