The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
