You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
