he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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