I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Randomize
