If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
