it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
honey bunches of taint.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Randomize
