People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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