I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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