She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
