I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
