Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize