Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
