I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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