debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Sorry my hands just texted you
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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