Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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