I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Randomize
