how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
