Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
