He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
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