I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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