love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Boobs are out for the taking
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize