Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize