brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
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