You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
