In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
