areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
This baby is an asshole
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Randomize
