i can't believe i had my finger in that
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
