she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize