I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Let's paint friendship bongs
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
