me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize