Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
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