We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize