Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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