i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I just want nice things and good sex
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
