so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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