Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Randomize
