We're like a lot better than the average bears
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
