We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
