your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize
