the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
it glows. i had to have it.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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