That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
